How to Make Friends, Comfort Crying Children, and Find Peanut Butter and the Best Chocolate in the World in a Foreign Culture

MANTEQUILLA DE MANI

As many of you know, my favorite food is peanut butter. I eat it every morning for breakfast. Since Ecuador does not have the comforts of home, I decided to go out and buy peanut butter yesterday. Imagine my shock when I was not able to find it in five different food stores. How can a country of more than 13 million people live without peanut butter?

After searching for two hours, I decided to take my mind off of my gastronomical depression by attending a practice session of a local ultimate Frisbee club. I thought that playing ultimate Frisbee would be a great way to get exercise and make new friends, my number one priority this week. I put on my exercise gear, braided my hair, and hopped on a bus to the club’s field in the north of Quito, where I was let down once again. The field was empty.

I proceeded to walk down the street, feeling dejected and lonely. Suddenly, I came upon a monolithic structure: Megamaxi. Since none of my readers are Ecuadorian, I will have to define Megamaxi. It is one store which contains a RadioShack, a Moviestar franchise (the Ecuadorian equivalent of Verizon), and a large complex which houses all of the contents of Target and Super Stop and Shop (Dominick’s for my Chicagoan readers) combined. Somehow, it was invented outside of the United States. If any store were to have peanut butter, it would be Megamaxi.

I walked inside and was immediately confronted by models in crop tops handing out samples, a lavish ceremony for a new nutrition supplement for infants, and loads of gringos. Desperate to find my favorite food, I ran past all of the distractions and approached an employee.

Antigone: ¿Dónde está la mantiquilla de mani?
Employee: En numero cinco.

I ran to aisle five and grabbed a jar of George Washington Carver’s greatest creation, only to experience sticker shock. One standard jar of Jif cost more than six dollars. I wanted peanut butter so much that I was willing to pay ten dollars for it.

After I paid, I returned to my hostal. Instead of eating a normal dinner, I decided to sit in my room and eat peanut butter.


THE BEST CHOCOLATE IN THE WORLD

There is no story for this caption, only a fact. Ignore everything that you have ever heard about chocolate from Belgium, Switzerland, and other countries in Western Europe. Ecuador’s Café Kallari sells the best tasting chocolate in the world, and they do it in a socially responsible manner.


THE DENTIST

Virtually every small child fears the dentist. Anyone who instinctively welcomes the placement of sharp, metal objects in his mouth would not survive evolution. Today I was charged with taking fifteen children between the ages of 2 and 8 from their market in southern Quito to the dentist.

My fellow volunteers and I are proud to say that we had an 80% success rate. Three children cried too much to have their teeth cleaned. One seven-year-old boy had come to the market play group for the first time. When he sat down in the dentist’s chair, he started bawling. I held his hand, explained that the dentist was only putting air, water and toothpaste in his mouth, and promised him that no one was going to hurt him. Despite my assurances and stories of surviving 18 years of biannual dentist visits, he was not able to overcome his fear of the dentist’s frightening-looking tools. In the end, the dentist gave him some fluoride. Then I picked him up and carried him down four flights of stairs so that he could rejoin the group. You always know when a little kid really needs a hug because they nuzzle their face in your neck and shoulder.


YES, I AM A GRINGA

Carnaval is coming. In Ecuador, it is customary to celebrate by throwing water balloons at and dumping buckets of water on other people. Being a gringa only increases the likelihood of getting wet. So far I have been hit with three water balloons. Keep in mind that Carnaval is not supposed to start for another week.


I’M MAKING FRIENDS!

My first few days in Ecuador were lonely because I did not know anyone. However, my social life is quickly improving. Tonight, I am going to café with a bunch of girls from work. Then, I am spending Saturday and Sunday visiting the equator and local hot springs with some other volunteers.

In one week, I am going to start a homestay. It will be nice to have someone to eat breakfast and dinner with every day.